Thursday 31 August 2017

Time Keeps Ticking

Well the new school year is almost upon us.  The kiddies look to Tuesday with one part lament for the passing of the summer mixed with one part excitement to see their friends again and kick-off another year of learning.

I realized today, that this will be the last year that my oldest is in the same school as one of her sisters until grade 12, six years from now.  At first I felt a little sad for the one being left behind only to realize that at least she still has our youngest to keep her company at their present school.  Whereas my oldest will be on her own, trailblazing into the great unknown that is middle-school and high school.  That takes guts and grit.

I mentioned it to my girls but was careful not to do it in a way that added too much gravity to the situation.  I mean, perhaps the feeling I infused this situation with is simply parental projection...maybe I'm a little uneasy with the notion of the girls growing up and striking out on their own.  Okay, alright...I know they're still a few years from disembarking the family ship, but each milestone, like this one, reminds me of how fleeting our time together is.  And quite frankly the milestones seem to clipping by a little faster each year.

I often go through my days without much thought to the temporal nature of familial situation.  When you're in the midst of the day-to-day busyness, struggles and joy it often seems like there is no end in sight.  Then you take a moment to pause, step back, look around and you suddenly realize that what's to come is actually less than what has been, at least in regards to time.

My hope is that what's to come is far greater than what has come and gone.  I hope it is filled with time well spent with one another and spent well on experiences that draw us closer together as a family.  I strive to make it count so that the girls never feel like they're going it alone regardless of the space between us.


Wednesday 30 August 2017

Full House...Again

Cottage living is the perfect foil to the regimented pace of the rest of the year.  It is the ideal setting to create sun-drenched, slightly overexposed memories of lazy summer days; my girls more than willing actors emerse themselves in their summer roles, running, swimming, climbing trees (and anything else they can wrap their arms around), kayaking, jumping and bouncing, reading, day dreaming and just general summertime romping.  My wife is an eager enabler and has taken every opportunity to sneak away to the cottage to allow the girls to make the most of their respite from the rigours of the school year. 

Therefore I have had the unusual experience of being home alone more often than usual this summer as I stay behind to attend to the duties of the job.  Two conflicting reactions emerge:

1) I'm home alone! 

2) I'm home alone... 

There are benefits to being home alone.  I can eat the best looking piece of barbecued chicken - guilt free.  I can start working out at eight instead of ten and crank the music while I do (though I inevitably turn it down because I think it's too loud).  I watch movies with the volume turned up too loud (which I inevitably turn down as well...because I'm also free to turn it down as low as I want).  I can sleep in the middle of the bed snoring as loudly as I want or at least until I wake myself up.  Ah yes - these are the indulgences that are not to be taken for granted.

I enjoy being home alone...for about ten minutes, but then I get lonely.  I don't like eating dinner by myself even if I do get the choice cuts of meat.  I miss the silly questions that zing around the table and being regaled with the adventures of the day even if it comes with extra mess and constant negotiating over how much food needs to be eaten before one becomes eligible for dessert.  It's not the same watching a movie without being able to cuddle with my honeybun and it just doesn't feel right falling asleep and waking up to an empty house. 

It puts my mind at ease and fills my heart with joy knowing my house is full...full of what is most important to me. 

"Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one's youth.  How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them."